Visitors

It's official.

I'm in love with this face.

I mean, how does someone resist such a face?

They would have to be made of wood. Or iron. Or steel. Whatever people who do not melt into puddles of blubbery goo are made of when faced with such pouty lips, chubby cheeks and rolls of fat.

They simply can't be human. But me? I a big glop of blubbery goo when faced with my niece's adorable face.

My sister, her husband, and their two children arrived in Hawaii late Wednesday night. They spend a few days on Oahu with David and I and are now spending this week on the Big Island. I already miss Anna.

Also, James is now huge. He's two going on five. Seriously.

On Thursday, we went for a hike to Makapuu lighthouse (see below) and then to Bellows AFS, my favorite beach on the island.

Bellows has the softest, most powdery sand of all the beaches, is the least crowded (because only military can access it on the weekdays), and has hot showers.

James enjoyed playing in the sand and destroying sand castles. And even though he used to LOVE beaches when he was younger (like 6 months ago), he was suddenly very afraid of the water.

He just wanted to play in the sand.


But as he watched his parents swim in the ocean he just couldn't stand it anymore and ran into the water.

The water is also a really pretty color at Bellows.

Look at that fist! He could so beat up on kids twice his age.

And once again, I'm a blubbery gloop of goo.

Geez, she doesn't even have to try, does she?

On Friday, my sister and her family went to the Arizona Memorial and then I sent my sister and her husband away to go to dinner while I watched the kids.

For the record, Anna is a terrible flirt.

Especially with David. Apparently, she has no respect for our marital vows.

We tried to feed James dinner and David taught him how to growl and shake his fists while eating.

And when I would point my camera at him, James would lean over and give me this face.

I mean, what's an aunt to do?

On Saturday, we went to the Polynesian Cultural Center for the day. Of course, it rained the whole time we were there, but it was still fun and James enjoyed running around and watching all the female hula dancers and the drummers. Anna just giggled and gurgled as she always does and charmed every one she met. I can't wait to see them one more time before they leave the islands forever. I really miss having family around.

Please welcome....Su-Yom!

So I wasn't in a very bloggy mood and then I told the story of David and Liz and then I wasn't in a very bloggy mood again. I've got several things I've been meaning to post--from our joint birthday celebrations and my education in all things Korean--but that will have to wait. First, I must introduce to the newest member of our family.

This is Su-yom. It means whiskers in Korean. On Tuesday night, I was cooking up dinner when David received a call from our friend Jenn. She and her husband (they of the awesome parties) are also moving to Korea, but a month before us. They have two small kids and two cats, and Jenn was stressed to her max with the thought of moving all these living things to a foreign country and so she asked if we would like to adopt their sweet-natured one and a half year old all black cat. (They took her in a year ago from another girl who could not keep her.)

David and I of course had talked about getting a cat but we had not made any decisions about when to get this cat. (My parents have adopted my cat Emerson, pictured in the last post, but he's so spoiled living with them that I don't think he'd adjust to a small apartment in Asia.) We wanted to get an older cat (i.e. not a kitten) but we wanted to be sure that she had come from a good home and had a gentle nature. It seemed like a perfect opportunity but we were still a little hesitant. I hated the thought of transporting a poor animal to a foreign country but whether she came to us or stayed with Jenn, Su-Yom was going to Korea. Also, Jenn gave us all the things we needed: cat food, cat litter, litter box, playthings, food bowls, etc. All we needed to do was come pick her up and take her home with us. And if it didn't work out, we could take her back and Jenn would find her another home. And we already knew that Su-Yom was a very sweet cat who still had a bit of playfulness still left in her.

Besides, how can you say no to this face?

Or these little paws?

We couldn't. And so Su-Yom (no idea how it's spelled) has been with us for the last three days. She's a bit skittish at times, but she can also be quite cuddly when she wants to be. (She snuggled up on David's lap, purring away, while we watched TV last night.) She's totally an indoor cat, which is good since we can't let her outside and she's very well behaved and not afraid of children, since she was previously living with a 4 and a 2 year old. She doesn't jump on counters like some cats I know and she doesn't whine a lot either. She's still rather small for a cat and she doesn't eat much but she's already begun terrorizing the geckos in the air conditioning unit, which I am quite in favor of. Aside from scattering some cat litter on our bathroom floor, she hasn't scratched or torn anything yet, doesn't shed a great deal and is extremely well-behaved.

The only thing is that I'm trying to decide if I should change her name. While her Korean name is very cute and she will be a Korean cat in a short time but she doesn't answer to that name. She doesn't really answer to any name really, except for Cat. And only if you keep saying it. We have a tradition in my family of naming our cats after authors or poets, but I can't think of a good female author to name her after. Maybe this is why we always get male cats. Much easier to name. (My next male cat will be named Steinbeck. Just so you know.) But then I'd feel bad changing her name so maybe I'll just find a good nickname for her.

But in any case, I love black cats.
They're so enigmatic.

Cats and Korea

This is Seoul. At night. I'm going to live there. Apparently.

Well, I've told most of my friends and family and announced it on Facebook, but I realized that I never said anything on my blog, so here's the official announcement: David and I are moving to South Korea! Now, we've known for about year that Korea was a possibility, known for about 5 months that Korea was almost a sure thing, but we didn't know with absolute certainty and we didn't know when. David got his orders about two weeks ago and we have to report to David's new duty station near Seoul on June 18th. It's much earlier than we had anticipated but we're still very excited about the prospect of moving to Asia. (And I'll certainly be WAY more excited once our paperwork is all complete because, boy, is that a nightmare!) I can't wait to travel Asia. So.....if you've ever wanted to visit Korea, you'll have a place to stay for the next two years. Please come.

Now, because we are moving half-way around the world, David and I don't expect to return to the States during our two year tour so we're planning on visiting our families during the month of June before we leave. So if you'll be in or near San Diego on May 29th through June 7 or Atlanta from June 7 to the 16th, let us know! We'd love to see you! [All dates are tentative at this point.]

The best thing about our move? You know, besides the wonderful adventures, the culture shock, and new environment, is that I finally get to have a cat again.

Because it's the only way we can live off base. (And base housing is pretty bad, we hear.)

So yay for cats and Korea. In that order.

I really love cats....

A lot.


See? So cute!

How I Became Mrs. Malone, Part VI

Just in time for Valentine's Day, here's the final chapter of How I Became Mrs. Malone (wherein, I actually do become Mrs. Malone.)

When I last left you, I had spent Spring Break in Hawaii, gone to Atlanta in May to meet David's family, and then spent a week in California together in August. After a difficult fall semester (in which I did not get to see David at all), I was very much looking forward to Christmas when I would be reunited with David again. David flew in on Christmas Eve and after a rather low-key Christmas, we spent the day after Christmas shopping for new shoes. (My Christmas present from David. He still really hates the shoes I got that day, but they are comfortable!)

I knew that the engagement was coming and I knew it was coming that night. When you have a long distance relationship, it's really hard to be spontaneous with moments like these. I knew David had the ring--and despite my best efforts, I never did find it--and I knew he did not want to wait a long time before making our engagement official. Not that everyone didn't already know we were getting married. Not that we hadn't already set the date. I'd already ordered my dress (a gorgeous Maggie Sottero ivory lace gown which I love and will love until the day I die), met with the florist, and sampled cakes. All I needed was the ring. The actual proposal was immaterial to me. And I guess I had already gotten my spontaneous and surprising proposal a year and a half before. This time, I was prepared and ready for it. And I finally knew what my answer was going to be.

The night of our engagement.

So the day after Christmas Eve, David and I got all dressed up and went to a quaint Italian restaurant called Osteria Romantica near La Jolla Shores, my favorite beach in San Diego. We had a delicious meal, during which we recounted our entire relationship from the very first moment I saw David with applesauce bulging out of his pockets to the long months of separation that we had endured. After dinner, we went for a walk on the beach. It was a chilly night--as chilly as San Diego gets during the winter--and I was surprised by the number of people still out, having bonfires. We walked until we were far enough away from the other people and David said some really nice things (I was too anxious to really pay attention by this point) and then, against my wishes, David got down on one knee, in the sand, and proposed. I quickly said yes--almost before he had gotten the question out of his mouth--and stuck out my hand for the ring. It was a simple square-cut solitaire with a thin, delicate band, but it was perfect for me. Inside, David had inscribed "uxoriously yours." (Uxorious means excessively devoted to one's wife. I would have loved to have seen the jeweler's face when David requested that.) We drove home to my expectant parents and announced that FINALLY, we were officially engaged, to the shock of no one.

The NEXT day, December 27th, I went to the San Diego temple to take out my endowments for the first time. It was wonderful to have my family there--my mom and dad, grandmother, Jason, my sister-in-law Elisa--and David. Afterwards, we went to my favorite Mexican restaurant, Fidel's, in Solana Beach. The rest of our Christmas break together is a bit of a blur. There were wedding preparations to contend with, engagement photos to take, decisions to be made, etc. I wanted to get as much done as I could while in San Diego since I would not be back until two weeks before the wedding. And though it can be done, it is mighty difficult to plan a wedding in San Diego when you live in Washington D.C. Thank goodness my mother has done this 3 times before and knew just what to do.

One of our engagement photos.

New Year's Eve was not as eventful. David and I had both gotten sick and we just laid around all night. I'm not even sure if we were able to make it to midnight before falling asleep. On January 3rd, both David and I flew to Chicago and then I boarded a plane headed for DCA (Reagan airport) and David got on one for BWI (Baltimore). David had finally managed to get enrolled in a language training class near Fort Meade for 5 weeks, which meant that he was now only an hour away from me. We spent as much time together as we could. He would borrow the rental car assigned to him and the other girl attending the class to come see me during the weekdays while I would take the commuter train up to BWI on the weekends and then we would rent a car and travel around. We went to Mt. Vernon, Gunston Hall, the Baltimore Aquarium (and ate at Roy's for the first time, which has become one of my favorite restaurants), made several trips to the D.C. temple, ate at Chipotle's approximately 10 times(since there none in Hawaii), went on a tour of the West Wing (compliments of my friend Jen who worked at the White House), and visited Old Town Alexandria. Over Martin Luther King, Jr. Day weekend, David and I rented a car and drove up to New Jersey to see Jason and Elisa. (Luckily, David and Jason get along really well because they both share a love of Legos and Star Wars.) We drove into New York City on Saturday and did a session at the Manhattan temple, went to the top of the Empire State Building, and then visited Times Square. It was my third time to NYC and David's first but I think you could spend your life there and never see everything worth seeing. Still, I like my NYC in small doses.

Me David, Elisa and Jason on the top of the Empire State Building

While David was tackling Korean during the day, I had just started my last semester of grad school which included an internship at the Smithsonian's National Museum of American History. I worked with a curator in the Music, Sports and Entertainment department to assist her with the publication of a new book on the museum's collection of puppets. I spent time researching, organizing and re-cataloguing the collection and untangling string after tangled string of 100 year old puppets to be photographed for the book. I did, however, get on a first name basis with Kermit the Frog, Howdy Doody and Charlie McCarthy. Oscar was there too but he really is a grouch. (Just kidding...)

At the Smithsonian with Howdy Doody, Kermit and Charlie McCarthy.

I also had a class on race in America (which ended up being one of my favorite and most thought-provoking classes even though it was the one most outside of my academic comfort zone) and a class about vernacular architecture (loved the subject, HATED the professor).

We spent our birthdays together and then David flew back to Hawaii on February 9th, the day after my birthday. We went back to our long distance lives, me busy with school, work and my internship and David with work and his first semester back at school. I wanted to go to Hawaii for Spring Break again, but the tickets were incredibly expensive and so I opted to go to Utah for Spring Break to visit my sister and do research on a paper I was writing for my vernacular architecture class on Mormon tabernacles. I flew into Denver, where Cassy had been visiting friends, on March 14 and then we drove back to Utah together, stopping in East Carbon to visit my grandmother, grandfather, and my parents and sister Bobbi, who were also in Utah that weekend. It was the last time I saw my Grandpa before he died in October.

Salt Lake Assembly Hall, Temple Square

While in Utah, I visited a bunch of tabernacles (Brigham City, Bountiful, Salt Lake, Provo, and Heber) and went through a temple session in Provo and Salt Lake (so gorgeous inside!), did research, visited family, ate at all my favorite places, and played with my absolutely adorable nephew.

The absolutely adorable nephew helping me research at the Bountiful Tabernacle.

I flew back to D.C. on March 21st, and got down to the business of graduating. I turned in my application for graduation, studied, took, and passed my comprehensive exams, and finished all my coursework (though I cut it close this semester). My friends threw me a bridal shower and my high school friend Whitney was able to come, having come down from Massachusetts to visit that weekend, which was a real treat.


I graduated on May 16, and my parents had flown in that day, while Jason and Elisa drove down from New Jersey. We spent the rest of the week exploring. I took them on a tour of the American History museum, we visited monuments and memorials, the Masonic temple in Alexandria, the Udvar-Hazy extension of the Air and Space Museum, went to several baseball games, and visited some Civil War battlefields. My parents left on May 22nd. I spent the next two days packing, shipping my books and other belongings to Hawaii, and saying good-bye to friends and then I left D.C. for good on May 24th.

Family photo with Kermit.

I had two weeks until the wedding and one week until I would see David again. There were details to finalize, dress fittings, another bridal shower to attend, and some freaking out to do. I wasn't really worried about getting married at this point, but more stressed with getting everything organized and arranged, with all the friends and family coming in for the wedding, balancing between spending time with my family and with David's, who were all flying in (minus one sister) from Atlanta for the occasion. We got our marriage license, went to the Wild Animal Park, went to a Padres game, had tuxedos fitted and us girls had our nails done. And then, it was the day before my wedding. All the days leading up to June 6th are now a big blur of activity. I can't even recall how I felt, if I was nervous or anxious or just excited.

Me with my bridesmaids: Jen, Cassy, me, Bobbi and Kara

I woke up the next morning, did my hair and makeup, and my mother and I drove to the temple together where we met David and Jacob a little before 10am (they spent the night at my grandparents' house). David and I were whisked away to be attended by many different people and we were finally brought in the sealing room at 11 am. I wish I could remember what Brother Kirby said (I know there a something about our children) but all I remember is looking at my friends and family watching, some of them crying (Kara!), and then being told that I could kiss David and thinking he was just a little too enthusiastic about that. After the ceremony was completed, we were able to greet all our guests and then we went outside to take pictures in my gorgeous, beautiful wedding dress. (My dad even told me that of all the wedding dresses worn by his daughters, mine was his favorite.)


After all the photos were taken, David and I checked into our hotel at the La Jolla Hyatt and then drove back to my parent's house were we had an informal early dinner for close friends and family on the back deck. We had Mexican food, catered by the best little taco shop in Poway, El Ranchito. I really wanted to have a dinner with just my close friends because I knew I wouldn't get much of a chance to talk to them during the reception. After everyone was done eating, my mom proposed a toast, which took most of the participants a little by surprise. So after chatting with everyone, and helping to clean up, David and I drove back to La Jolla, to our fancy little hotel room, to spend our first night as husband and wife. (I'll spare you the details.)

We came back to my parent's house in the afternoon and David and I took Jen and Jacob (the maid of honor and best man, respectively) out to lunch at Mimi's Cafe and then returned home to help with the last minute reception details. David, however, had to finish a paper for one of his classes, so I helped while he worked on that downstairs. Of course, we were both late getting ready for the reception and we ended up being 15 minutes late (I hate not being punctual). The reception was held at Templar's Hall in Old Poway Park and it's a beautiful location for a wedding reception. The centerpieces consisted of brown urns filled with purple and white flowers on top of a stack of antique books. I called the theme of my reception "literary romance."

The centerpieces.

We had a beautiful cake and cupcakes, lots of fresh fruit, sandwiches, salad, and pink lemonade. We danced our first song to "Blue Eyes" by Carey Brothers, but I forgot to toss my bouquet. It was a beautiful reception, though not a terribly fancy one, but I mostly enjoyed getting to wear my dress and talking to all the guests who had come to wish us well.

My high school friends: Nicole, Kara, me, and Tessa

After cleaning up and saying our final good-byes to friends and family (who we most likely would not see again), David and I drove up to my parent's cabin in the Palomar Mountains where we spent the next two nights. We came home, packed up all our belongings and then flew to Oahu together on Monday, June 9th and I saw my new home for the first time. (For the record, David did carry me over the threshold.) The next day we flew to the Big Island where we spent the next four days at Hawaii Volcanoes National Park. We hiked into the volcano, trekked through a lava tube, saw breathtaking waterfalls, went swimming on a black sand beach, and visited the only historic house on the island. I even built an entire puzzle by myself while David wrote his last paper for his class. :-) It was a wonderful honeymoon and a great start to our marriage.



I can't believe it's been eight months already. It's certainly always entertaining being married to David and the next two years that we'll spend living in South Korea will certainly be quite the adventure. Thanks for letting me share our story with you. I'm sure you'll get to hear lots more about our adventures together as they happen.

How I Became Mrs. Malone, Part V

Recap: David and I have been dating for one year; eleven months of that long distance. We spent Christmas and Spring Break together. May--and David's sister's wedding--is fast approaching. Also, I hope David will return to continue to "set the record straight." David seems to have some problems with the way I'm telling this story, even though I think I'm making him out to be a saint...

I failed to mention one very important thing about the time between Christmas and when I saw David again in March: I almost broke up with him. I even wrote out a really long letter about how we needed to take "a break" (yeah, like that ever works) but I never sent it and I never brought it up in our daily conversations (which had grown shorter and shorter by the day). David could tell that something was wrong and I knew he could tell but I really didn't know what to do. I didn't want to give up my relationship with David, him being my best friend and confidante, but I didn't know if I still wanted to be his girlfriend or possibly even his wife. It was a miserable time, for both of us. I had already planned my trip to Hawaii and so I resolved that if I was to break up with David, I would do it in person. (Which would have been really awkward if it happened at the beginning of my trip, but luckily, as soon as I was with David again, I knew breaking up would be a mistake.) I wish I knew why I had all these serious doubts then and several times throughout our two year relationship but I have no idea. It always seemed to be a battle between my heart and my mind. My heart was telling me that David was the one, but my mind was only focusing on all the reasons why we shouldn't be together. (I have thankfully gotten over all of those issues.)

By May, however, our relationship was as strong as ever, as I prepared to meet David's entire family in Atlanta. I flew into Atlanta on Wednesday, May 9, and David picked me up (he had arrived a few days prior) and we drove to his older sister Fiona's house to spend the night. The next day, David and I took his youngest sister Kristy with us to the Georgia Aquarium and the Martin Luther King Memorial. I was then brought to David's home to meet the future in-laws. (Talk about nerve-wracking.) David and I grew up in two very different families and environments and while I knew all that from our many conversations, it was another thing to actually witness it in person. I was definitely out of my element--I had no idea what to talk about--but his family was very welcoming and I was put at ease. It helped, of course, that everyone was preoccupied with Lorann's wedding and didn't have much time to focus on me.

Lorann and Matt were married on Friday, May 11th and that occupied our entire day. Our next three days in Atlanta were spent watching TV/movies with David's family, meeting a whole bunch of David's friends, and going through David's old stuff in the shed. We both flew back to D.C. together on Monday, May 14th and David stayed for a week. (It was our first time on a plane together. I loved getting to sleep on David's shoulder.) The majority of the week in D.C. was spent dragging David to all my favorite D.C. attractions: the National Archives, Building Museum, Portrait Gallery, American Art Museum, Chinatown, Ford's Theater, the Lincoln monument, the Holocaust Museum, DAR Museum, Library of Congress, Union Station, and the National Cathedral. We also did a bit of ring shopping and I introduced David to all my D.C. friends. On Saturday, we rented a car and drove out to Shenandoah National Park to do some hiking. It is absolutely gorgeous there.



We have a tradition in my family of buying Christmas ornaments from all the places we visit (my mom has ornaments from around the world) and so David and I started the tradition for ourselves by purchasing our first ornament together at Shenandoah.

On Sunday, I cooked wontons (I really love those things!) for all my roommates, friends, and Jacob [remember him? David's old roommate? he lives in Maryland now] to spend more time with David and to say good-bye. The next afternoon, I took David to the airport, said my tearful good-byes and returned to my lonely long-distance life. By this point, I was pretty sure that David was the one that I wanted to marry, but every so often, I would be stricken with immense doubt. To be clear, I never doubted for a second that David would be a wonderful husband and father but I did doubt myself, all the time. Was I ready to get married? Could I be a good wife to David? Was there someone better? I couldn't think of anyone better than David but at the same time, I couldn't understand why, after all this time, I didn't have an absolute certainty that David was the right choice. (For the record, that moment never came. And I don't think it comes for a lot of people. Marriage is the absolute biggest leap of faith that you will ever take. But I eventually found the faith I needed to dive right in.)

The summer passed rather quickly. I was doing an internship at a historic house in Georgetown and enjoying my summer respite from homework and papers. My parents came out to visit in July and we drove up to New Jersey to see my brother and his wife and then we all went to Palmyra for the annual Book of Mormon pageant there. I felt that my parents hadn't really embraced David yet or maybe they were just living in denial about the state of my relationship and the fact that their baby was growing up. But, while waiting for the pageant to start, my mom and I started discussing wedding plans and I tentatively set my wedding date for June 6th, which was still a whole year away. After that, I knew my mom was on board, but my dad still needed convincing.

At the end of July, David bought a condo in Hawaii. He didn't really consult me in the decision, but it seemed to do the trick with my dad. Somehow the fact that my prospective husband owned property--and in Hawaii, no less--impressed my father. Thereafter, he seemed to warm up to the idea that David was sticking around.

Near the end of August, I flew to Salt Lake to visit my sister Cassy (and mother, who was there with my sister) and meet my new nephew James who is the most adorable boy ever.


See? Adorable. He's almost two years old now, but he only gets cuter as he ages. He also looks like a 3 year old now. Anyway, Mom, Cassy, and I went to a few stores to try on wedding dresses because I figured I might as well look while I was in Utah, home of the modest wedding dress. I found a few that I liked but none that I really loved. After spending the weekend with my sister, I flew home to San Diego and met David, who had flown in from Hawaii to spend the week with me.

We spent some time with my parents and then borrowed my mother's car and drove up to Monterey to re-visit where all the magic had happened and to see the few friends we still had there, including Monica, who kindly let us crash at her place. We visited some of our favorite spots in Monterey--we even went back to the Rock of Confession and had a long conversation there about the course our relationship had taken--and played miniature golf. See, David and I had been trying to go mini golfing for like a year but Oahu's only course shut down and we never had time in Atlanta or D.C. So yes, we mini golfed.


Here we are at Lover's Point. After two days in Monterey, we drove up to San Francisco to visit my friends Tessa and Nicole. We went out to dinner and then Nicole let us sleep at her place before we headed home for San Diego the next day. It was a whirlwind trip but it was fun to go on our first road trip together (and to discover that we could spent 8 hours in a car together and not want to kill each other) and to see old friends and reminisce. David and I spent a few more days together before we parted for our separate ends of the country. [I normally wrote down everything that we did together, but I didn't for this trip, so the details are fuzzy.]

We planned on seeing each other again in November, when David was supposed to come to Fort Meade near Baltimore for a 5 week language training course. I was absolutely thrilled that we'd get to spend so much time together in one chunk but alas, the military, as it often does, decided to change its mind and David's trip was cancelled which meant that we wouldn't see each other again until Christmas Eve. I tried to be philosophical about it but it wasn't the best time to be disappointed. San Diego had nearly burnt to the ground in October--and my best friend's family lost their home--and then my aunt, my mom's sister, passed away. All I wanted was to have David close by and since there was nothing we could do about the distance between us, I tried to focus on school and on not having a mental breakdown.

Somehow, I survived the semester and joyously left D.C. to fly home to California. I was looking forward to seeing David for the first time in 4 months and finally getting a ring to put on my finger....but since this installment is already so dang long (why am I incapable of brevity?) the story of our engagement and wedding will be the next and, I hope, final chapter of this never-ending saga. But I'm making no promises.

Initial Rantings

First of all, it is true that I have resisted posting on this blog for quite some time. Basically the entire time we’ve been married. I have my reasons for resisting, which are the same reasons I said I would never join facebook… which I did do, and now I can’t get enough. I think the fear of being hopelessly addicted to blogging has contributed to keeping me away. I don’t know about all of you, but I’ve greatly enjoyed reading Liz’s blog. I think she has a beautiful way with words and she’s positively hilarious. She doesn’t see it, but I think she’s quite funny.

Well, to make a proper introduction, allow me introduce myself properly. My name is David Malone, husband of Liz Malone. I’m the second born of five children, and I’m the only boy (that in and of itself should explain quite a bit about me). I was born in the great state of Virginia, but I don’t remember much of it. My father was in the Navy at the time and we didn’t stay there long. We moved to South Carolina for a minute, and then to Utah for a couple of years, before my parents finally settled into the house they begrudgingly still live in. They live in the great state of Georgia, the land that I call home since I spent the majority of life there. From age 7 to 23, Atlanta was my crib… Oh yeh, ‘daz right. I’m from ‘da hood. (Liz will probably kill me for bringing up my ghetto upbringing.) It was rough growing up in ‘da hood… Oh, who am I kidding? I’m as pasty white as they come! A suburbanite. (Fo’ shizzle.) I grew up in Marietta, GA which is considered part of the metro-Atlanta area. At any rate… I love legos and SciFi; my favorite movies include the Princess Bride and Star Dust; I adore all things feminine; my favorite color is purple; I love math, teaching, and rocking out on Guitar Hero and Rock Band. If that isn’t enough information for you, feel free to ask me whatever. I’ve always maintained that my life is an open book, if anyone is interested enough to read.

So, now, in my defense I must clarify some of what Liz has written. She wrote them that way on purpose, I think, to coerce me into finally writing something. I can’t blame her for that. So starting with ‘How I Came to Be Mrs. Malone’ part I….

The applesauce was really tasty, and I love applesauce, and I didn’t want to see it go to waste, and I didn’t have a bag on me, so in my somewhat abnormal thought process, the only thing I could do was to take the applesauce, and take as many as I could, and I had to put them in my pockets because I could carry more that way, and the guy who brought them sooo didn’t care. So, you see, it only makes sense that I would put 11-12 applesauce cups in the many pockets of my suit coat and pants in order to save them from going to waste…. I should be viewed as a hero for my role in that story… but it is true that I give a pretty terrible first impression. Maybe people will like me better if I stop stealing stuff….

I would also like to echo my praise of Monica, though, to this day, I still don’t know why she would invite me to a private gathering and not tell the hostess that I (AND my roommate) was coming to her birthday party. I need to clarify something about Liz’s birthday party though. When Monica called to invite me to Liz’s party she specifically said, “We’re having a fondue party, so bring something to be dipped in chocolate, or teas.” It was almost like the ‘teas’ part was an afterthought. Of course she had said cheese, but I didn’t hear that. I was sure I had heard her wrong, so I said back to her, “Teas?” Monica verified that that was indeed what she had said, but I still doubted and I said to her again, “TEAS?!” Again she affirmed that was what she had said. We ran through that a few more times before I finally said, “Okay.” So, I brought herbal tea. Imagine my surprise when, in an attempt not to make a bad first impression, I still managed to make a fool of myself. We apparently both misheard each other, but it didn’t matter because we all had a good laugh at my expense and Cassy really enjoyed the tea.

So on to part II. I’d had a wonderful time at Liz’s dinner and I enjoyed talking to her. It seemed so easy to talk to her and I found her intelligence truly sexy. There’s just no other way to put that. I love it when she gets all excited about intelligent stuff and starts spouting off everything she knows. Mm-hmmm…. Anyway, I was intrigued by her so I didn’t mind at all when she started showing up more often and hanging out at church longer to talk to me. Now, I know what many of you are thinking, because I’ve heard it all before from about a bajillion other people. I’ve been accused of leading Liz on and being slow to make up my mind. Well, that’s only partially true. I was slow to make up my mind, but leading her on was never my intention. I was building a friendship. See, I’ve had other relationships in which one minute we were acquaintances and the next we were girlfriend/boyfriend without anything in between. I’ve also had relationships in which the girl did all the pursuing, making it too easy for me and I ended up not appreciating what I had. I’ve also had several relationships ruined by people who talk too much and ruin good things. I was trying desperately to avoid all of those things and not ruin a potential good thing with Liz. (And I was trying not to fail out of DLI. Those language classes are insanely difficult.) So, from my perspective, I wanted to hang out more and get to know Liz better, but I felt that things needed to be done properly. We needed to be friends first before we brought in all the romance stuff.

Now, if only it was that simple. Like I said, I did have a hard time making up my mind whether or not to date Liz. I loved being with her, but I knew I was coming to Hawaii, that she was going to DC, and that we were running out of time. I also had the vain delusion that I would find my future spouse in Hawaii. Then, as Liz put it, “Sunday happened.” Finding her sitting at my bench made me very upset because I felt our relationship wasn’t to that level yet. I had resolved to just be friends, but this was more than that. It made me very uncomfortable, and she knew it, and I knew that she knew it, and she probably knew that I knew that she knew it. I was uneasy around her the rest of the day, but something clicked in my head after that. I knew that something had to be done. I needed to make up my mind. I needed to let her know where I stood… as soon as I figured it out.

So, I went home that night and stayed up late reading my scriptures, and I had a little talk with the Big Man upstairs. Now, there have been a few times in my life when I’ve known that I needed to do something. I’ve never ignored that feeling, despite how I knew it would play out. Sometimes those things didn’t turn out to be very good for me, but I know that it was what I had to do at the time and I stand by my actions despite the repercussions. Asking Liz on a date was one of those things. I was so confident in my decision that I’d already resolved to marry her if she would have me. Call me crazy if you want, but it all turned out just wonderfully in the end, didn’t it? You see, while I was at DLI, one day when I felt especially lonely, I was talking to God and I told him that if he would just tell me who I was going to marry, I could wait as long as it took to be with her. And I only had to wait two years!

I love Liz dearly, and even after only five days of dating, I didn’t want to live without her. She is so much fun to be with and we are so great together—I didn’t want to give that up. Asking her to marry me wasn’t a spur-of-the-moment thing. I’d spent the entire four days before that thinking about nothing else. I know what you are thinking… “Four *WHOLE* Days?!” In addition to wanting to be with her, asking Liz to marry me was another one of those things that I felt had to be done. I didn’t know what would happen, but I knew I had to ask. I think that it was necessary to get her to think more long-term. After all, asking someone to stick with you for two years while you are on either sides of the nation and you’ve only been hanging out for a couple of months is a big commitment. I never pushed her to answer because I didn’t think the answer was as important as the question.

That’ll have to do for now. I’d love to write more, but sleepiness is starting to make typing coherently very difficult. I hope you’ve all enjoyed my rantings! Good night!

How I Became Mrs. Malone, Part IV

To recap: After a long waiting period, David and I finally had our first date on May 2nd, 2006. By May 31st, he had left for Hawaii. I was preparing to move to Washington D.C in August.

Part IV: The First Year Apart

Near the end of July, I packed up my meager belongings into the back of my green pick-up truck and headed home to San Diego for a brief stay before flying to Hawaii to visit David for 10 days. [Incidentally my Ford Ranger, which I had driven on and off since high school, was called David by my family. The name was taken from the movie Sabrina with Audrey Hepburn; my sisters' car was called Sabrina, my mother's was Linus and mine was David. Coincidence or fate? You be the judge.) My parents were not entirely thrilled that I was going all the way to Hawaii to visit a boy. Of course they didn't know yet how far the relationship had already progressed. And I figured that if my brother went all the way to Puerto Rico to meet a girl for the FIRST time (his now-wife) then going to Hawaii to see my boyfriend of three months wasn't that big of a deal. But parents will always be parents.

So on Wednesday July 26, I flew to Honolulu. I was apprehensive and anxious to see David again after two months apart. Of course, we had talked on the phone every day, sometimes for 4-5 hours each day, but there's a big difference between talking to a person and being with a person. David met me at the airport with a beautiful purple flower lei. At first, I almost didn't recognize him and it was a tad awkward. But the awkwardness quickly wore away as we drove to his one bedroom apartment in Mililani. He had just moved into his new place and he had no furniture besides a kitchen table, bed, and dresser. Instead, David had filled the entire living room with index cards. Each card--one for every day that we had been apart--had something different written on them in various colors of crayon. June 8: I miss you! June 28: I love your bone structure! June 15: I'm addicted to you! July 5: I thank God everyday for you! June 13: I adore your femininity! July 16: I love how nerdy you are! June 11: You're so smart! June 4: Wo ai ni. ["I love you" in Chinese, though David wrote the actual Chinese characters.] Of course, I kept those index cards.

David worked on Thursday and Friday that week but he took leave the next week so that we could do all the touristy things together. We went to Pearl Harbor and the Arizona memorial, ate dim sum in Chinatown, walked through Waikiki, ate delicious Dole Whip [pineapple sherbet] at the Dole Plantation, went swimming in Waimea Bay and snorkeling in North Shore, hiked Diamond Head, visited the Honolulu Zoo and Waikiki Aquarium (both tiny!!!) and the Honolulu Academy of Arts (which has a surprisingly large and varied collection), ate shaved ice, and went to the movies. Mostly, we just enjoyed spending time together and talking. The day before I was set to fly home, David told me that he had his heart set on me and that he'd wait for me. I was a wreck on the plane ride home. I was sad to be leaving David, especially since I didn't know when I'd see him again but also torn between feelings of great love and almost doomed certainty that this relationship couldn't last the two years it would take me to get my master's.

Four days after leaving Hawaii, on August 9, I got back on a plane, this time headed for Washington, D.C. I was completely overwhelmed when I first arrived. I had never moved someplace where I did not know a single person. My sister's brother-in-law lived in Maryland (and he kindly picked me up from the airport and drove me to my new home) but other than that, I knew no one. (Until my best friend Jen moved there in January.) I was extremely thankful for David though. Even though he wasn't there with me, David was understanding and sympathetic, always willing to listen to me whine and complain and stress out. It was a great comfort to have someone to figuratively hold my hand while I embarked on this new and extremely scary chapter of my life.

Of all the things I have done in my life, and the answers I've sought through prayer, moving to D.C. and attending to grad school was something that I absolutely knew I needed to do. I don't know why--even now--but I never doubted that I was supposed to be right where I was at that point in my life. This certainty was confirmed to me by the wonderful circumstances I had landed myself in. I found a wonderfully large room to rent in a wonderfully spacious house in Alexandria, Virginia with four very wonderful women. (Well, seven by the time I left. Three girls left in the time I lived there and were replaced by equally wonderful women.) I learned a tremendous amount from them and I know I couldn't have survived my two years in D.C. without such a supportive group of friends.

I didn't start class for another month, so I spent most of August unpacking my belongings, getting to know my new roommates, exploring D.C's many attractions, and looking for part-time work. By the end of August, I had found a part-time job with a debt collections lawyer in Farragut West only a few blocks from GW's campus. It wasn't a terribly exciting job--nor one that paid well--but it was enough to meet my living expenses and it offered a very flexible schedule which I needed for school. Meanwhile, David and I tried to adjust to the distance between us. Not only were we now 6,000 miles apart, but we had to contend with a 5 or 6 hour time difference (Hawaii doesn't do daylight savings time) which made finding a good time to talk rather difficult.

But on September 9, I received a package that changed my life. Okay, our lives. David sent me a "going back to school" care package which included a movie, Flintstones vitamins (to keep my bones nice and healthy), Care Bear band-aids, kleenex, post-in notes, a book of Sudoku puzzles, a tiara, gum, chapstick, dried mango and mostly importantly, a webcam. For any person out there who may be considering a long-distance relationship, webcams are an absolute must. Once we finally got both of our webcams to work, David and I would conduct all our conversations in front of the camera. I truly believe that the only reason that our relationship withstood the two years apart was because we could see each other over the webcam. I could tell when David got a haircut or compliment him on a new shirt, but most of all, we could see facial expressions and share every facet of our lives with each other, even though we couldn't physically be there.

The rest of the time between September through December was relatively uneventful though we did celebrate our 6-month anniversary on November 2nd. I was extremely busy with classes and trying to not feel like an idiot. If you've ever been to grad school--or if you've ever considered going--you should know that for the first two months, you will feel like the biggest idiot known to man. I was so out of my league and pretty dang intimidated by all my professors and fellow students, particularly the Ph.D. candidates. But then, suddenly, I wasn't stupid anymore. I actually found out that I can be somewhat intelligent from time to time. The time seemed to pass very slowly, but finally, the semester ended, and I flew home to San Diego for Christmas.

David joined my family for Christmas that year and we got to spend two weeks together. I took him all around San Diego and we also went to Disneyland because David had never been. He also got to meet most of my family (at least on my Dad's side), who approved, for the most part. I think it took awhile for my dad especially to accept David.

Our first Christmas together. At my grandparents' house.

I remember two things from that Christmas. One, that David bought me a beautiful diamond necklace and two, that my family took family photos that year. While I had already informed my parents that I was 95% sure that David and I were going to get married, my mother wasn't taking any chances so she had the photographer take pictures with David and without David. I understood why my mother insisted on that--what if it didn't work out and we always had family photos with this random guy?--but I'm glad we've got the pictures now of all four kids with all of their spouses. (Especially since we haven't all been together since that Christmas.)

Family photo without David.

Family photo with David.

Spending Christmas and New Year's with David was such a treat that it made the rest of January that we spent apart very miserable. It was especially hard to spend our birthdays apart in February. But in March, I made the VERY long journey from D.C. to Hawaii for Spring Break. David didn't take the time off work this time, so I worked on my research papers and caught up on my reading while he was at work. I was there for 10 days and while there, we hiked to Makapuu Lighthouse, went swimming at Bellows AFB (still my favorite beach here), went bowling, walked around Waikiki and went ocean kayaking which left me with the worst sunburn of my life. I also went to Pearl Harbor again and to the Bishop Museum one day while David was at work.

I returned to D.C. to finish out my most successful semester of school (straight A's!) and looked forward (with a tiny bit of apprehensive) to May, when I was flying to Atlanta to meet David's family for the first time for his sister's wedding. That story, and the next year of our dating relationship will be up next.

P.S. This story is turning out to be much MUCH longer than I had expected, but I wanted to write it all down anyway to put in my journal. But I thought I might as well share all of it with those of you who still might find it somewhat interesting. :-)

Happy Happy Birthday David!

I'm interrupting the saga of David and Liz to bring you this important announcement: today is my dear husband's 28th birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAVID! (Wasn't he such an adorable baby?) I've known David for nearly 4 years now (crazy!) and this is only the second time that I've been able to celebrate his birthday with him. So, in honor of his 28 years, here are 28 reasons why I love David and am so glad that he picked me to be his wife.


1.) His blue, blue eyes.

2.) And his long, long eyelashes.

3.) He always carries a white handkerchief with him, where ever he goes. I don’t know why, but this is something I have always secretly loved about him. Perhaps because it’s old-fashioned and not many people have handkerchiefs, but I love it. Especially on Sunday mornings, sitting in the cold chapel when my nose starts running.

4.) He opens all doors for me. And every time he does, I feel like a lady, even when I look like a mangy rat.

5.) No matter what time I crawl into bed—which can sometimes be hours after he’s fallen asleep—if I scoot close enough to him to lay my head on his shoulder, his arms instantly move to surround him. Even in his sleep. He also sometimes grabs my butt in his sleep but I don’t really mind that either.

6.) Despite his scrappy appearance (and the fact that he weighs only 10-15 pounds more than me), he can and does lift me up and carry me around, all the time. And he has carried me to bed on more than one occasion when I’ve fallen asleep on the couch.

7.) He tells me that he loves me, every day.

8.) He calls me adorable, even after witnessing some of my less adorable quirks.

9.) He doesn’t judge me for those aforementioned quirks.

10.) He’s a math genius. He proves math formulas for fun.

11.) He had “uxoriously yours” inscribed inside my engagement ring. Ladies, look up “uxorious” in the dictionary and teach your husbands, boyfriends, and guy friends what it means. You can thank me later.

12.) He kills the bugs so I don’t have to. And he hides the nastier ones from my view.

13.) He never gets upset when I’m too tired or uninspired to cook dinner. (This has been especially true this week.)

14.) He’s always encouraging and never discouraging.

15.) His laugh. It’s rather infectious and I often find myself laughing at him laughing at funny parts of movies rather than at the funny part itself.

16.) His spiritual side. He understands the gospel far better than I do.

17.) I love how fervently he wants to do good in this world and how generous he is.

18.) I also love how adorable he gets when I make him blush.

19.) He’s got this thing for high heeled shoes. He likes it when I wear them and so he never minds buying a nice pair for me. Or three. He even enjoys shopping.

20.) He’s always considerate of my needs and is willing to be dragged to museum after museum or visit historic sites though it’s really not his thing.

21.) He’s the better spouse in every single way but he has a way of still showing his appreciation for even the little, everyday things that I do which makes me feel like I really contribute.

22.) He freely and willingly admits to friends and co-workers how much he loves me and how he’d do anything for me that I asked. He doesn’t try to be all “manly.”

23.) He knows how to fix things like cars and computers and doorknobs.

24.) He wants to have sons so that he can teach them how to be gentlemen and how to treat women right. He’ll be a patient and loving father.

25.) There is laughter in our home everyday. He has a great talent for making me laugh, even when it’s because he does something I find annoying.

26.) He’s a laundry Nazi. Now, I don’t really love that he’s so particular about how his clothing is separated and how the washing machine should be run (because I’m certainly not so particular), but do I love that he’s so adamant about it and is so thorough in most everything that he does. Plus, he’s really good at getting all the chocolate stains off of my clothes.

27.) He’s incredibly compassionate and helps anyone who asks for help whether it be physical, monetary, or emotional support.

28.) He’s my best friend. He knows everything about me and always listens to what I have to say, even if I’ve said it all before. If that’s not love, then I don’t know what is.


Happy birthday my love. I hope you have a wonderful birthday! (And continue to put up with me for many more years.)

How I Became Mrs. Malone, Part III

Part III, for those who are still reading at home. This could be subtitled, "The Month in Monterey."

To recap: After weeks and weeks of waiting and frustration, David and I finally had our first date on Tuesday, May 2nd. We were "together," a couple, from then on. We saw each other every single day from the first date until David left for Hawaii on May 31st.

So on Thursday, May 4th, I cooked David dinner and he told me he loved me. (Not because of the food. I don't remember what I made but I'm pretty sure it wasn't all that spectacular.) I said "I love you" back. It was quick, yes, but there had been so much "relationship foreplay," as David calls it, that we were already way past all that first date crap and we knew each well enough to say those words. David is the first and only man I've ever said that to.

On Saturday, May 6th, David and I went down to Cannery Row and ate a meal of savory and sweet crepes. We went back to my apartment, which was thankfully empty since my sister was gone for the weekend, visiting her own husband who was in Arizona, and we sat on our tiny little love seat to talk. And then David got all quiet and I asked what he was thinking. And before the synapses in my brain could process what was happening, David had gotten on one knee in front of my couch and was proposing. To me. After five days. Marriage.

To say I freaked out would be an understatement. I didn't scream "NO!" in his face (though that was, admittedly, my first gut reaction) but I said I'd think about it, pray and fast about it. So after talking a bit more, David left, leaving me to contemplate marriage with a man I'd barely just begun to date. I was in agony all night. I knew in my gut that I couldn't say yes (and not just because I had already accepted my admission to GWU). I knew there were people out there who made decisions about marriage in even less time and without knowing their prospective spouses nearly as well as I now knew David. And I knew plenty of people who had had short courtships and who had wonderful, fulfilling, and loving marriages. (My sister for one, although her marriage was still young at that point.) But I knew--had always known--that I was not one of those people. I had always felt that I would date my future husband for at least a year, mostly because I knew that I could be a hard person to love and I wanted him to be absolutely certain that he knew what he was getting himself into when he picked me to be his wife. And yet some crazy person wanted to marry me after just a few dates.

All Saturday night I fretted about what to say to David. I called my friend Jen and freaked out with her. I think she was laughing the whole time. You know, on the inside. I finally managed to fall asleep but as soon as I woke up Sunday morning, I was once again pained with the realization that I would either have to say yes to David or end the relationship. Somehow, in my mind, I thought that saying "no" would mean that our new and burgeoning relationship would instantly be over. I didn't think that David would be satisfied with a "No, not yet. But maybe someday..." type of answer. So it was all or nothing. Since church didn't start until 2:30, I had all morning and most of the afternoon to stress out.

I got to church a few minutes early and ran into David in the cultural hall. I was absolutely dreading this moment. But David simply grabbed my hand, said hello and kissed me. And that was it. He didn't ask me what my answer was and he didn't feel the need to press the issue. And so we walked into the chapel hand-in-hand to announce our couplehood to the whole gossipy ward. And what a sensation it was.

Do you remember Paul, the socially awkward stalker who was in love with me? Well, during Sacrament, who but Paul should happen to pass us the bread and witness David and I sitting together, holding hands. Neither David or I could look him in the eye and at the end of the passing of the bread and water, Paul sat down in a pew on the opposite side of the chapel from us. But we could still hear him muttering to his friend something to the effect of: "What the @#*&! She's holding hands with David Malone!" Monica, who was sitting only a few benches behind him had a very good laugh. After Sacrament was over, before heading to the Bishop's office, David kissed me again, and our fate was sealed. Everyone in the whole ward now knew we were a couple.

Even though David hadn't asked for my answer, the question of marriage was still out there, hanging over our heads. On May 9th, our one week anniversary, David took me to Isabella's, a seafood restaurant right on Fisherman's Wharf for a delicious dinner (I got grilled salmon, the only fish I really like), and we then drove up into the mountains, away from the city lights, to star gaze from the hood of David's car. As we were lying there, staring up at the stars, David brought up the topic of marriage. He didn't ask what I thought about marrying him, but what I thought about marriage in general. And having been tricked into it, I told him honestly that I was not ready for marriage yet. So David got his answer: not a "no, not you" but a "no, not yet." And he was fine with that.

David and I have since discussed (repeatedly) why he felt so inspired to ask me to marry him so early into our relationship. David really would be the better person to explain himself (I keep pestering him to write something!) but it basically boils down to this: we had only a month to establish a relationship before we would be separated. And while I wasn't on board yet (not a week into our relationship), David was thinking long-term. He wanted to marry me and he was willing to make it work, even long-distance. In fact, he knew he wanted to marry me before he asked me out on our first date. And in order for our relationship to have a fighting chance, he needed to make me understand that he was in this to marry me. Otherwise, I think I would have said good-bye to David on May 31st, never seen him again, and always wondered what could have been.

With marriage now on both of our minds, the next three weeks together were certainly entertaining and memorable. On May 12th, we went to a big gala held at the Monterey Bay Aquarium for all the volunteers. I had started volunteering at the Aquarium on the weekends when I first arrived in Monterey and it was a very rewarding experience, not only because I got to spend a lot of time there but because I learned a lot about marine animals, which was, once upon a time, my first dream job. (I wanted to be a marine biologist from about the age of 9 to 13.) I have been to aquariums all around the United States (San Diego, Boston, Waikiki, Atlanta, and Baltimore) and none of them compare to Monterey. We ate a delicious meal of spicy lamb and salad in front of the tuna and jellyfish in the outer bay aquarium and sampled desserts in front of tiger sharks and swordfish. The aquarium was beautiful at night and I loved being able to take my new boyfriend with me. Plus I was wearing a new outfit bought just for the occasion.

That Sunday--on Mother's Day--both David and I told our mothers that we were seeing each other. Now, I probably would have put off this conversation for quite some time if it hadn't have been for the fact that my own mother was coming up to Monterey for a visit that very week. I'd already given David a "friend test" the day before Mother's Day by dragging him up to San Francisco to meet my friend Nicole who lived there. (We were going up anyway to go to the Oakland temple...I thought we should go across the Bay and have lunch with my friends who lived there, but only Nicole was available that night.) Getting friend approval is a much different thing than having your brand-new boyfriend meet your mother for the first time only two weeks after you start dating. But David, being the understanding person that he is--and already crazy enough to think he wanted to marry me--was not terribly nervous. My mother mostly observed us together but didn't grill David for information. Of course, we had only been dating for 2 weeks and my mother probably had no idea how serious our relationship already was. (I told no one about the proposal.)

When I asked my mother later what she thought of David, all she said was something to the effect of, "I was surprised to see how much you cuddled. I worried that you'd never be in a relationship because you never liked being touched." Well thanks Mom. But it was a bit true. I'd never been a touchy-feely person until David came along. (I still hate getting hugs by people I barely know....which is hard in Hawaii since a hug and a cheek kiss is practically the standard greeting procedure. Freaks. Me. Out.)

Anyway, the mom meeting over with no hiccups, David and I had a little over a week and a half left together. We spent every minute we could together, talking, going to movies, helping friends move, visiting the Farmer's Market and going to ward bonfires on the beach. [I don't have time here, but someone must remind me to tell the Double Scoops Malone story. It still embarrasses David to this day. And he's so adorable when he blushes.] The last Sunday David was in California, May 28th, I made a big dinner (won tons, of course) for all our friends. Wednesday, May 31st, I took the day off work and helped David pack up the remainder of his belongings, cooked him some brunch, and then drove him to the tiny airport in Monterey, where we said our final goodbyes. I handled it pretty well....I didn't start crying until I got home.

So it was a whirlwind first month, but by the end of it, I knew enough about David to be sure that I could marry him. It only took me another year to finally admit it to myself.

At this point, you may be thinking to yourself, "Holy crap, we're only up to the first month of a two year relationship? Will this story never end?!?" Well don't worry, the next two years can be condensed quite a bit....hopefully into one part. Unless David pops up to defend himself. Then who knows how long it will take...

How I Came to Be Mrs. Malone Part II

Since I did keep a pretty faithful journal during the months leading up to our first date, I could probably give you a day-by-day account of the time between that St. Patrick's Day dance and May 2nd, our first date. I'll try not to bore you with the details. I realize, in retrospect, that the time it took between our birthdays and David asking me out was not that long, but it seemed like an eternity to me.

After those first few meetings, I was interested in David, but as nothing more than a fun person to date. I was certainly not looking for anything serious because I knew David would be leaving Monterey soon to move to Hawaii, and I was planning on going to graduate school. In fact, it was the week after our group outing to the movies that I got my acceptance letter from GWU and decided to move to Washington, D.C. But still, I could not get David off my mind. I did things I had never done before. I would call to talk or invite him to hang out. I would text him. I would approach him first. I had never, ever had the courage to do this with any boy before and that, in of itself, should have been some clue to me that this was more than just a passing fancy. But lucky for me, I didn't see things that way. Otherwise, I would have packed up camp and run far, far away and never have talked to David again. (This probably explains why I didn't date much at BYU.)

In any case, over the next few weeks, David and I would text back and forth. (I wasn't the proficient texter then as I am now. It would take me five minutes to type out some short response. David would respond five seconds later with a lengthy novel. But I caught on quick.) I found ways to be involved in activities I knew David would participate in. I created events to invite him to. And I also second-guessed myself and over-analyzed every little thing that David said. On the one hand, I was pretty sure that David like me too, but on the other hand, he would not ask me out.

On March 29, my sister and I held a "Something on a Stick" dinner party. Everything we served--from shish kabobs, to fuit kabobs, to carmel apples, Popsicles, and cheese on toothpicks--was on a stick. We loved having dinner parties and this particular party was held as much for the actual food as for the chance it gave me to invite David over for dinner. The night of the party, David stayed for over an hour after everyone had left, to help clean and to talk.

The next two weeks were excruciating for me because I hardly heard or saw David at all. I didn't really realize it at the time, but David was prepping to take the DLPT, the massive language test that every linguist has to pass in order to leave DLI and actually start working. It's a huge deal and quite a number of people fail. If you fail after two chances, you're out of luck and get re-assigned to another job. So big, massive, life-changing test. Hence, I was in misery, waiting for David to call me, while he was in misery trying to pass this test.

In that time, I got asked out by another guy in the ward who I had gone on one date with before. While he was somewhat socially awkward and often forgot my name (he called me Cassy on numerous occasions), I didn't see any reason to turn him down. I even thought it might be a good hint for David that he should ask me out since he was not the only boy around. So on April 8th, as I was getting ready for this date, I FINALLY got a call from David, asking if I wanted to hang out. I regretfully declined, told him all about my date, and we then proceeded to talk for 45 minutes until my date showed up and I hung up on David in a hurry.

The next day--Sunday--I proceeded to throw myself at David and while we did eventfully end up hanging out that night, I felt like a complete and utter fool for all my efforts. However, the next night at FHE, my stalker [Paul, a very awkward young man who got it in his head that he was in love with me and would not leave me alone] came up to me and told me that I was "glowing" at church the day before. I wrote this in my journal that night:

"So I glow. And I know why. And my cat knows why. And I hope David knows why because he's the reason I'm glowing. But I couldn't tell Paul that the reason I'm glowing is because I have a crush/non-crush (emphasis on the crush) on David and that honestly part of the reason that I like David, besides the fact that he's so funny and gentlemenly and adorable, is because he's nice to Paul which is a difficult thing to do and that most people (including myself) are not so good at. I told him that ever since I got into George Washington, things have just been looking up for me
and I've been happier, which is true. But at glowed at church because of David. I glowed. And maybe only freakish ex-stalkers saw it, but maybe, just maybe, David noticed too and liked what he saw."

There was little further interaction with David until Easter weekend, when he again called me to hang out but my sister and I were driving down to San Diego so I understandably couldn't make it. While home that weekend, though, I ended up calling David just to talk and we chatted for about two hours. The next Wednesday after Easter (April 19), I called up David to invite him over for dinner on Saturday because we had invited the missionaries over and needed another male to be there too. We ended up talking for 5 hours that night. (He had just finished taking his DLPT that day so he was in a very good mood. He found out the next day that he had passed.) Even though it was a great 5 hour conversation, I had somehow convinced myself in the course of our conversation that David would never ask me out.

Saturday night, David came over for dinner. Afterwards, we were trying to think of something to do but it was getting late and all the options were swiftly dwindling. Then my sister announced that we had to leave because she needed to prepare her Relief Society lesson for the next day and she needed peace and quiet. David and I went out to his car and started to drive aimlessly. Again, from my journal:

"So we drove down to Asilomar, which is a beautiful and more deserted section of the peninsula, right on the coast and we walked down to the beach, and climbed on the rocks, and looked at the stars (we never did find Orion) and hunted for frogs who were hiding out in the rocks. Eventually, we just sat down on a little rock [I now call this rock the "Rock of Confession"]together and talked. Obviously, we were very close together and although we were touching (arms, elbows, knees) at several points, he never tried to get closer. His face was right there and it was so tempting just to lean over the 10 inches and….well, it never happened. Because I believe the guy should make the first move and because he would never do it, regardless of whether or not he does like me, which is still up for debate. So we sat and talked and it grew colder and colder until I couldn’t feel my toes and poor David was probably half frozen because he didn’t even have a jacket. He drove me home and we sat in his car and talked for a little while before he went around to open my door and walked up to my apartment door because he’s a well-taught Southern boy. We talked for a little longer on the doorstep (and conversations on any doorstep at any time with any person are always awkward) until I opened the door and said goodnight. So, by that time it was 2 am and I texted him to say “thanks, I had a good time and good night” and then fell asleep. "

The next Monday, after FHE, David and I ended up sitting in the church parking lot until midnight, just talking. Again, there was no physical contact, there was no asking out on dates. By this time, we were seeing each other more and more and talking quite often, but I still had no idea what David was thinking or if he was even going to ask me out at all. It was around this time, at the end of April, that I was getting frustrated with all the waiting. I was sure that there was mutual affection on both our sides, but David still had not asked me out and time was dwindling. I was ready to give up and just walk away. And then Sunday happened.

Sunday, April 30th I was looking cute. I got to church and saw that David's normal pew was empty and I decided to sit there and wait for him to come into the chapel. I don't know what possessed me to sit there. I just did, even though I thought about getting up and moving 50 times. David finally came in, sat down next to me, started chatting with me, but I knew something was wrong. He found excuses to go talk to other people, he wouldn't look at me. It was SO painfully awkward and uncomfortable. I knew that David didn't want me there. I didn't want to be there either once I realized how much David did not want me being there, like I was trespassing onto his property and I didn't have permission to be there, but he was too nice to tell me to leave. I thought of getting up to go to the bathroom and not returning. I thought of just moving. I thought of feigning some illness and just leaving church all together. But no, I had to just keep sitting there for all those sixty plus miserable minutes. As soon as Sacrament Meeting was over, David bolted and I was done. I couldn't do it any more. All this time I thought David and I were growing close, becoming friends, more than friends. But in one Sunday, I had wrecked everything. I didn't understand what happened, but I knew I had done something wrong. And I figured that was sign that I needed to let me know that I was wasting my time with David and so by the end of the day, I had decided whatever it was that we had was over.

I'd rather that David tell his side of the story of what happened that night, but apparently, my sitting next to him in church was just the kick in the pants that he needed to finally make up his mind about me. And he resolved that night--just as I had given up all hope--to ask me out, which he did the next night after FHE.

On Tuesday, May 2nd, David and I went on our first date. He picked me up and we went to California Pizza Kitchen for dinner. Afterwards, we ended up at Starbucks where we ordered a hot chocolate and David pulled out a few coloring books and Crayons that he had purchased earlier that day. There was a Curious George one for him and a Disney Princess one for me. So we sat there, talking and coloring, until they kicked us out of Starbucks. David drove me home and we sat in his car and talked about this and that until somehow (I can't remember how it all happened) we were confessing our feelings for one another and kissing. And just like that, we were together. There was no defining the relationship, we just were. We fell effortlessly into being a couple and the next month we had together in Monterey was full of wonderful, beginning of a relationship memories.

But if you think all the excitement and drama was over once David finally asked me out, you'd be wrong.

That's part III.