Most days, I face the challenges of having a baby who doesn't like to sleep with equanimity and perspective. Some days its a real challenge. Some days, you just want to give your baby away to the highest bidder.
Like today, for instance.
Zara went to bed at 8:30 last night and woke up every two hours wanting more food or comfort. By 5:30 a.m., she decided it was time to wake up and play. I tried desperately to get her to go back to sleep and for awhile, she let me just hold her while I drifted in and out of a semi-awake state before she grew tired and wriggled and waggled until she'd wrested her little body free of my arms. I finally being conscious enough to realize that her diaper was soaked so I stumbled into the nursery and with great wailing and gnashing of teeth managed to get a new diaper securely fastened over her cute behind. I did not, however, have the presence of mind or fortitude to snap her pajamas closed.
Despite my pleas and promises that I'd buy her a pony, Zara would not return to sleep. I set her in her crib and returned to the bed, hoping to get a little more sleep on my own, but Zara's ear-splitting shrieks prevented any more sleep from occurring. But after ten minutes of crying, Zara was now sufficiently worn out that she fell back into a fitful sleep in my arms and I retreated back to the bed for a little more shut-eye, Zara passed out on my chest.
I woke 45 minutes later to the feel of something wet near my hand only to discover that Zara had managed to pull her diaper off and was sitting, bare bummed and pleased as punch, in an ever spreading pool of pee, munching on the corner of my phone.
So, resigning myself to a sleepless fate, I cleaned that baby off, secured a new diaper over her nefarious bottom, and went about changing the sheets. The whole time I was secretly contemplating the benefits of selling off my child--she's pretty cute, I bet someone would pay good money for her, right?--and wondering why I was crazy enough to think I wanted MORE kids. But as I was holding Zara in my arms, she turned to me and gave me the biggest innocent baby smile, complete with two newly emerging bottom teeth and I realized that I'd just have to keep her after all. She's way too cute to let go.
But next time, I make no promises.
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3 comments:
Seriously some days it really kind of sucks to be a mom.
By the way you're totally allowed to change your mind on the whole "Cry-it-Out" thing. A crazy night here and there is to be expected but if every night is a crazy night, that is not sustainable.
Or not of course. Whatever gets you through the night is all right as they say.
I should modify that statement to say that "Zara doesn't like to sleep alone" not that she doesn't like to sleep. We tried the cry it out method for a little while, but it made both Zara and I miserable, so I threw that out the door. After reading "Our Babies, Ourselves," (a really fascinating anthropological study of how biology and culture shape the way we parent), I decided that since 90% of the world finds co-sleeping perfectly acceptable and beneficial, that's the method we would use. It's been working for us, but I don't know that's a long-term solution. But I feel that that's what Zara needs right now and it doesn't disrupt my sleep very much as well.
Hey if it works for you! Co-sleeping wasn't much of an option for us since Adele had to sleep at an angle the first 6ish months of her life b/c of acid reflux. As long as you get the sleep you need most of the time, it's cool.
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